Funniest Thing for December

Tell ITN about the funniest thing that ever happened to you while traveling in a foreign country. There are no restrictions on length. (ITN prints no info on destinations in the U.S., Canada, Mexico or the Caribbean.) The ITN staff will choose each month’s winner, who will receive a free one-year subscription to ITN. Entries not chosen cannot be acknowledged.

This month’s winner is MILT SWOPE of Rescue, California:

On a driving tour of England in the spring of 2003, we stopped to tour the Scotney Castle Garden & Estate in Kent. I first had to visit the rest room, which was some distance from the entrance. I told my wife to go ahead and that I would join her at the entrance.

When I returned, no wife. I began scurrying back and forth from the gift shop to the entrance looking for her, as she had the National Trust passes. The attendant, an elderly English volunteer in dapper clothing, was observing my frantic movements. He finally came up to me and said. “Sir, may I be of assistance? You seem to be a gentleman in dire distress.”

I replied, “Yes, I seem to have lost my wife.”

Without a moment’s hesitation but a twinkle in his eye he replied, “Quick, tell me how you did it. I have been trying to get rid of mine for years.”